Excessorize the Unexpected
Like so many people, I am always working to improve myself. I get overwhelmed easily and I am extremely hard on myself. I am constantly plagued by guilt that I’m not doing enough with my own goals or being enough to those around me. I’ve had some curveballs thrown my way this past year and I have learned a lot about the dangers of expectations—of people and of life. Expectations generally lead to disappointment. Sometimes the trail takes an uncharted turn and if you don’t turn with it, you’re stuck alone in the wilderness. So I’ve been taking a new approach to living the past 6 months or so: I am following the winding trail and going with the flow. This means not overthinking everything, not second guessing my gut instincts, and not planning anything too far ahead. This goes for my relationships, my career, and my outfits (hah!).
Surrendering to the idea that we aren’t in control is a tough pill to swallow, but if anyone can teach us that lesson, it’s our children. You need not be a parent to learn to adapt to whatever life gives you, but having kids will fast track your course to becoming malleable. And I am embracing it. We can only take situations as they come and decide how to handle them moment-by-moment. My mantra has gone from “one day at a time” to “one hour at a time.” I only look at my calendar on a day-by-day basis, so I don’t get overwhelmed with all the commitments we have. If I am not feeling inspired, I won’t force myself to create. The vision will come and when it does I’ll be waiting—even if it’s at 3 AM. And if my daughter begs me to take her ice skating for months and when I finally do, she has an anxiety attack in the middle of Bryant Park, then we ditch the rink and go for ice cream. Deviating from “the plan” isn’t easy for people like me, but a plan is really just an illusion for control that can cause you to be blind to an even better possibility. How many times do things go perfectly according to plan? Rarely, and when they don’t, it causes stress and anger, and you lose that control you thought you had. So by choosing to prepare a blue print instead of creating a plan set in stone, and throwing out our expectations, we open ourselves up to tackle life one unexpected issue and one golden opportunity at a time. In other words, do you, but roll with the punches. And don't forget to put on your jewelry. Farewell, 2016.
Wearing: On Me- Jocelyn Fur Hat and Jacket, On Stella- Cute to the Core Boots, River Island Coat, RK Knits Hat
Photogtaphy By: Grant Friedman